As we recognize Mental Health Awareness Month, I want to offer something practical and educational to help deepen our understanding of mental health—particularly through a feminist, trauma-informed lens. At Mosaic Bloom Counseling, I regularly work with clients who struggle to understand their responses to trauma. This guide aims to normalize these experiences and provide a framework for understanding them within their proper context.
The Body’s Wisdom: Recognizing Trauma Responses
Trauma responses aren’t random or irrational—they’re adaptive survival mechanisms. When we experience something overwhelming, our nervous system activates to protect us. Understanding these responses can be a powerful step toward healing.
Common Trauma Responses and What They’re Telling Us
1. Fight Response
- What it looks like: Irritability, anger outbursts, argumentativeness, physical tension
- The wisdom it carries: “I need to protect myself” or “I need strong boundaries here”
- Social context: Note how fight responses are often interpreted differently based on gender and race—women’s anger is frequently labeled “hysteria” while men’s is normalized as “assertiveness”
2. Flight Response
- What it looks like: Anxiety, restlessness, avoidance, difficulty sitting still
- The wisdom it carries: “I need safety” or “I need space to process”
- Social context: Chronic flight responses often develop in environments where direct confrontation felt dangerous—particularly relevant for those in marginalized positions with less social power
3. Freeze Response
- What it looks like: Numbness, feeling stuck, inability to make decisions, dissociation
- The wisdom it carries: “This is too much to process right now” or “I need to conserve energy”
- Social context: Freeze responses often emerge when neither fighting nor fleeing seemed possible—common in prolonged situations where there was no escape
4. Fawn Response
- What it looks like: People-pleasing, difficulty setting boundaries, prioritizing others’ needs
- The wisdom it carries: “I need to maintain connection for survival” or “I’m trying to stay safe through appeasing others”
- Social context: Particularly common in those socialized as women or raised in environments where their needs were consistently subordinated to others
5. Flop Response
- What it looks like: Collapsing, fatigue, depression, giving up
- The wisdom it carries: “I need to conserve resources” or “I need deep rest”
- Social context: Often misinterpreted as laziness rather than recognized as a physiological response to overwhelming circumstances
Recognizing Trauma Responses in Daily Life
Many people don’t realize that these responses can be triggered in everyday situations that remind our nervous system of past threats. For example:
- A harsh email from a boss triggering a freeze response
- Conflict with a partner activating people-pleasing fawn behaviors
- Setting a boundary leading to fight energy or protective anger
- Overwhelming responsibilities causing collapse or withdrawal
When we understand these as nervous system responses rather than character flaws, we can approach ourselves with greater compassion.
A Feminist Framework: Trauma Responses in Social Context
A feminist approach to understanding trauma recognizes that these responses don’t occur in a vacuum. They’re shaped by:
Power dynamics: Those with less social power often develop more fawn or freeze responses as direct resistance carried greater risk.
Gender socialization: Many women are conditioned to suppress fight responses and instead resort to fawn behaviors that align with expectations of caregiving and nurturing.
Racial trauma: For people of color, hypervigilance and protective responses aren’t “overreactions” but adaptations to very real historical and ongoing threats.
Economic precarity: Financial instability creates conditions where the nervous system remains on high alert, making trauma responses more likely.
Understanding these contexts helps us recognize that our responses make perfect sense given our experiences—even when they no longer serve us in our present circumstances.
Tools for Regulation: Working With Trauma Responses
While trauma responses are normal, we can develop tools to regulate our nervous system when these responses arise:
Grounding techniques: Simple practices like feeling your feet on the floor, naming five things you can see, or placing a hand on your heart can help signal safety to your nervous system.
Window of tolerance awareness: Learning to recognize when you’re moving out of your regulated zone and taking steps before you become overwhelmed.
Body-based practices: Gentle movement, breath work, or progressive muscle relaxation can help shift the body out of protective states.
Self-compassion: Recognizing that your responses aren’t failures but adaptations—and speaking to yourself with kindness when they arise.
Community connection: Finding safe relationships where your experiences are understood and normalized.
When to Seek Support
While understanding trauma responses is empowering, sometimes we need additional support to heal, particularly when:
- Trauma responses significantly impact your daily functioning
- Self-regulation strategies aren’t providing relief
- You’re experiencing flashbacks or intrusive memories
- You feel stuck in patterns that once protected you but now limit you
Professional support through trauma-informed therapy can provide a safe container to work with these experiences. Approaches like EMDR, Internal Family Systems (IFS), and somatic therapies can be particularly helpful in addressing the physiological aspects of trauma.
Conclusion: Honoring the Wisdom in Your Responses
This Mental Health Awareness Month, I invite you to approach your trauma responses not as problems to eliminate but as adaptations that helped you survive. By understanding them within their proper social context, we can honor their wisdom while developing new ways of responding that better serve our present lives.
Your body’s protective responses deserve respect—they got you through difficult experiences. With compassion and context, we can work with these responses rather than against them, weaving even these fragments into the beautiful mosaic of healing.
